It's The Small Things

Life, as we know it, is not always perfect. Most of the time we face different challenges in life. But have we thought of how life could be so much different if we saw the small blessings that we encounter each day? As Facebook celebrates its 10th year anniversary, it gave us a little surprise video called "A Look Back". We saw our own videos as well as our friends'. We smile at those pictures with the most  number of likes as well as those being shared from the time we joined Facebook. Looking back, we saw progress on how we live and the people who became part of our progress.

As I was watching my own video, my five year life in a minute, I realized one thing, I wouldn't be able to reach today without the little things in life. Upon counting those blessings, I am amazed how God has honed me to become a better person and appreciate life even with just enough. For someone unemployed and living by faith, I have so much more right now than before. God does provide every single thing that I need. May not be all financial but most importantly, things i needed to survive. I am now looking at things and situations differently because everything I have are provided by my God....and everything is ALL HIS! As I count the blessings He has showered to me, it is still the small things that makes us complete. God is good, all the time!

#shefung2014

Total Black Out

A few days ago, I was watching a game show called Total Black Out. Its concept was the players were given tasks in a very dark room. However, the twist of the game was the announcement of the host that will trigger the fear of the players on what they will expect in the dark room. As a viewer, it was funny to watch the reactions of the players because they were not supposed to be afraid of the dark room because there's nothing to be afraid of.

While watching, it made me think about life. Life is about doing simple tasks and fear complicates it because it is just a mindset. We are all tasked to do something in our lifetime however, our mindset is based on the dictaion of other people. Then fear comes because we fear rejection. We let fear be our comforter to be accepted by society. We may not be living in a total black out world but the fear in us made our minds a total black out. When we want to have a change in our lives, we have to step out of our comfort zone and pursue our dreams. Persevere to reach for the success we long for.

Time is running fast these days and life is becoming even shorter. The Bible says in Hebrews 11:1, " Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Let's build up our faith in God our ONLY Helper in our lives to face our fears.

#shefung2014

The Revival

Hello everyone! I was hibernating from blogging for the past two years and here I go again writing down my life. Well to give all of you a heads up, the past two years have been a roller coaster ride. However, I was so blessed because I continue to experience a lot of things in two years.

I can say that for 2014, I will re-establish myself and keep you posted on my life events with a more enhanced optimist mindset. I will be telling you stories about my new found career, my travel experiences and May God use me to bless you, my readers and friends. I am excited to share my life with you! #shefung2014

Cheers for 2011

Well well well, 2011 is almost over and it was a year full of blessings! God has always been good to me but 2011...He's so amazing! So here's my top 10 list of my 2011 blessings...

10. Went to Siargao.
9. Can now avail my VL and SL.
8. Had a salary increase.
7. Transferred to another Dgroup.
6. Finally get insured.
5. Had a week's rest...FINALLY!
4. Acquired my Starbucks planner before the year ends.
3. Acquired my Nikon D3100.
2. Acquired my iPhone 4.
1. Found my Best Friend.

The list goes on...thank you Lord for all these things! Can't wait for another journey with You on 2012! A blessed NEW YEAR TO ALL!

The Power of Friendship

Whatever age group you belong, you will always get a chance to meet a lot of people. No matter how cranky or happy you are, people will bump into you. Then eventually, you get to know them better and become friends. It’s just sad that in today’s world, friendships are already distorted. You make friends for business connections, personal satisfactions, or even friends with benefits. Bottom line is, a lot of people today make friends for their own personal interest. And many would have their own hidden agenda. It’s hard to trust anyone today.

I’ve been through a lot of friendships my whole life and I have to admit, a lot of my friendships were shallow. Just having a good time is enough. There were a few deep friendships but it turned out that I was selfish because I did things for them so that my needs would be met. And if my expectations were not met, I provoke them to hate me. Years have pass and I learned my lesson.

This 2011, God promised me that He will fix my relationships with people. And one of the relationships He fixed, and still fixing, is to have a deep intimate friendship with a few people. In short, He will give me a “David-Jonathan” friendship. Honestly, I was really afraid because I was scared that I have to go through the cycle of pushing people away from my life again. But I trust Him and by faith, pursued this new found friendship.

Four months ago, marks the date when I met her. Or should I say, when I had the chance to know her better. She’s like a sister to me and she was the first person who’s so down right honest with me. She told me everything about her and she would even tell me what’s wrong with me. We’ve been through a lot of ups and downs for the past four months but I am confident that this friendship is growing stronger. Why? Simply because our friendship is an honest friendship. We rebuke each other with love and respect. Our communication lines are so open that we would find time talking to each other.  Giving each other assurance of our friendship.  And, most of all, it’s a God-centered friendship. Our love for God and each other keeps our friendship strong and unbreakable.

Friendship is a commitment. Just like David and Jonathan, it is a pact made between two people. I am blessed that God brought us together and He is using this friendship to build my character, as well as hers. I may not be a perfect friend but I have a commitment to God to stay with her through thick or thin. Plus, with God’s help, both of us can surely go through everything.

The Journey of Faith: A Mt. Pinatubo Experience

I was a girl scout during my elementary and high school years and hiking was one of the highlights when you joined scouting. After so many years, my friends and I thought of taking a hike at Mt. Pinatubo. I was excited because it's going to be a once in a lifetime experience. When I heard about the 2-hour trek, I was discouraged and wanted to go home but we still pushed through.

During the hike, God told me to relate this experience to my life. And, I learned a lot! The hike was so spectacular that I feel overwhelmed by the His presence. God has been teaching me about faith since my Siargao trip and was emphasized during the Mt. Pinatubo trip.

Here are some of the lessons I leaned during this trip:

1. The Choice - we were given an option whether to take the Old Way or the Sky Way. Passing the Old Way means we have to take a hike for 2 hours to reach the crater lake while the Sky Way, it's only about an hour. We chose the Old Way so that we could do some pictorials and enjoy the trek. I praise God that we took the Old Way because it is safer than the Sky Way because the latter has a very steep way that we could easily slide down to the cliff. And if we chose to take that trek, we won't be able to see much of the sceneries God has made. God reminded me of Matthew 7:13 "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it." God gave us a choice where we would go. To follow Him through the narrow way where He will be the one to guide us or of others through the wide way that would lead to destruction. For many, the narrow way may not be the  better choice because it's scary and there's a long way to go but they didn't see the whole picture. So they opted to go to the wide way even if they know that it would harm them. For me, I choose the narrow way where God will always be with me.

2. The Rocks and The Water - During our orientation, we were advised to bring at least 1 liter of water to prevent getting heat stroke and that we won't get dehydrated. I only brought 1 liter of water thinking that it's a burden to carry more than a liter. Along the way, I realized that one liter is not enough because it was a very long walk! I should have brought at least 2 liters instead. Good thing is they were selling water at the crater lake for P70...although it's expensive, I still bought to fill my thirst. While trekking, there were a lot of rocks, pebbles and sands. These hurt a lot because they would enter my sandals. However, along the way, there were streams that cross the trail. The water would help me remove the elements from my sandals. The rocks, pebbles and sand reminded me of the challenges in life while the water, the solution. Sometimes, the challenges I face are as big as the rocks or as small as the sand but one thing is for sure...it's not pleasant to have them in life. However, God allows challenges in my life so that I could learn and think of ways on how to give solution to a problem with God's help.  Jesus said in John 7:38, "Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him." The water serves as the solution during the trek...it removes the elements from my sandals and the water I brought quenched my thirst to prevent me from getting dehydrated. JESUS is the ONLY "water" in our life when we face our "rocks, pebbles and sand" and we must always be filled by Him or else, we get "dehydrated".

3. The Trek - Many times along the way, I get tired and just wanted to give up. I found myself complaining and telling myself that if it's just a cemented path, it would be easier for me to hike but the path was full of slopes and rocks. I also get discouraged when I would be the last person in line and having a hard time catching up. I admit that I wasn't fit enough to take the hike but since I already started it, I have to finish it. Then, Philippians 3:13 popped up in my mind which says, "Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, ¹⁴ I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." So, instead of ranting all the way, I focused my trek on seeing the Crater Lake which is the highlight of the whole journey. I am also encouraged by the patience of our tour guide because he not only carried my backpack, he would wait for me, assist me at some hard to cross paths and tell me stories about Mt. Pinatubo. God again used this opportunity for me to learn. In our life journey, we will be "trekking with people" but sometimes, we get left behind and feel discouraged. That's why it's important to have an accountability partner who will build us up. God designed us to be with people because we will not survive this journey alone. That's why there are a lot of  "one another" verses and one of them is found in 1 Thyessalonians 5:11 "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." and another one is Galatians 6:2 "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."  In relation to our Mt. Pinatubo trek, if the everyone would leave me behind, I might stayed at one spot and won't be able to see the Crater Lake anymore.

4. The Crater Lake - When I reached the entrance to the Crater Lake, I felt a sense of achievement and the long trek was all worth it because it was a beautiful site to rest. FINALLY the reward! When I saw the cross standing near the entrance, I just wanted to break down and cry! I right away had my picture taken so that I would be reminded of my life as a Christian that is very similar to this adventure. God spoke to me again, "Child, your faith and perseverance has brought you here. This adventure is only a glimpse of your life journey. Always remember that at the end of the day, you will be accountable to Me. I will never leave you nor forsake you. Whatever I promise you, I will fulfill. One day, you will be with Me and enjoy My real paradise for you. Come, take your rest. You deserve this. I LOVE YOU!" I am overwhelmed and speechless. I can't help but praise God and give Him all the glory! Just as 1 Corinthians 2:9 says, "However, as it is written: No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him” The Crater Lake may be a paradise but I can't wait to go to heaven and be with Jesus. No more pain, no more tears and no more suffering.

5. The Skyway - Going back to our base camp, we took the Sky Way already because it is the shorter route. We just wanted to go home and get some rest. I didn't want to leave the Crater Lake because I was already fine there. I didn't want to go back to the rocky trail anymore. However, I had to go back to reality. God again reminded me that Christian living won't be eaasy but I have to go back and tell of the wonderful adventure to others. Just as this trip, I am on a mission of living for Christ. Telling people about the Good News of Christ's love for us even though we are sinners. Plus, having the hope that we will one day meet Him in heaven if we believe in Him and have a realtionship with Him. John 3:16 says, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life."

Until now, although my body still hurts, the Mt. Pinatubo trek was all worth the pain. A different kind of worship took place because it was like God's practicum for me. The five points are just a summary of everything I learned from that journey. I can't wait for the day when I could finally say, "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." (2 Timothy 4:7) and hear Jesus say "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!" (Matthew 25:21) Words can't explain the experience I had in this trip....but TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!!

Fruit of the Spirit: Love

February is known for the LOVE month. I don't know about you but it seems like everybody's "in love" every February. It's fun to watch people during this month because you can see couples become sweeter and you can't spot any tough guys. It's like this is the only month where you can see smiles all around the metro.

At church, we started the "40 Days of Love" campaign last Sunday. We were taught that our goal to be Christ-like must have the direction of pursuing love. It may sound easy but it's easier said than done. We were made to be in a relationship and be accountable to each other. For most people, it's somewhat easy but for me, as someone who's indifferent and independent, it's really really hard! Yes, I do have friends but there's always a lot of hesitations to go to the intimate level. I've always wanted to be on the safe side....or rather the numb side because I don't want to feel any emotions especially the negative ones. I can stand not talking to anyone if I wanted to and tune out everyone in my life starting with those who are very close to my heart.

Some say, I am the ideal "best friend" because I would really go out of my way to do things for my friends but to be honest, once I realize that the friendship becomes deeper, I slowly pull off. Not even communicating with them. I do this not because I hate my friends but deep inside, I'm scared of losing them that's why I would be the one to pull off before they do. You might think I'm weird and such a bad person. but this is simply who I am.

Last year, God allowed me to join Glorious Hope Recovery Program and have committed to stop the cycle of shutting down my relationships. Though I'm still a working progress, I praise God because I am slowly learning to be involved with people. I was able to have an accountability partner and have fruitful relationships. I admit that there are still times that I feel like pulling off but God keeps on reminding me about the commitment I made last year.  Also, He keeps on reminding me about loving one another as His commandment. Loving is totally a conscious act and a leap of faith. I may not know how to do it but I believe God will help me go through this.

The Blamed

Judging people is the easiest reaction to do. We always look for someone to blame, condemn and judge. Why? Because we always want to be better than others. Inferiority is something unacceptable to the society. We always want to be on top of everything and submission is "showing weakness". Until when will this superiority complex stop? Well, from the society's point of view, it's a non-stop cycle. As long as someone wants to be better, then, it will never stop.

I myself understood how it felt like to be inferior. I always get blamed whenever something is wrong in the house. Or if something bad happened, I get accused. To be honest, I am really really sick and tired of it. Even if my hands were clean, I am still the point person....literally "point person". I often can't see the point why I am always being blamed about the wrong things as if I'm the jinx in the family....even to the most insignificant events. Upon contemplating, I was reminded of John 8:2-11...the exact verse that was discussed during our Christmas Party. I felt I was like the woman, being shamed and accused. No one will ever understand what I am going through but ONLY Jesus can. So, everytime I get blamed again, I hear His voice saying..."He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first" and "Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more" It does comfort me. Thank you Jesus for being there for me!

God Never Makes Mistakes

While watching the third episode of Glee, I was struck by the words of Sue's sister..."God never makes mistakes." It's true. How can a God who created the whole universe makes mistakes? In fact, He said that everything He created was good. I don't think God is a liar. But how come things became bad? It's because, sin entered the world. Sin, ruined everything including the GOOD creation of God. And, sin, separates us from God that's why there's such thing as death. And death, is the payment for our sin (Romans 3:23a). But, the GOOD NEWS is God so loved us that He gave His ONE and ONLY SON, Jesus Christ to save us from the bondage of sin. Jesus didn't have to die in our place but because He loves you and me so much that HE did it. All we have to do is to be humble, confess that we are sinners and believe in Him and what HE did at the cross. Ask Him to be the LORD and SAVIOR of your life and you will be transformed. Life transformation is a process. I myself is also a working progress of God. Walking with Him allows me to know Him more and compells me to love Him more that leads me to do what pleases Him. For it is by grace you have been saved through faith, not of works lest anyone should boast (Eph. 2:8-9).

In life, we don't always get what we want. We experience pain, trials, discomfort etc. These negative events will make us doubt if God really exists or if He really cares. When we don't have a relationship with Jesus, we always see everything in the negative perspective. However, according to Romans 8:28, "all things work together for good to those who LOVE God and to those who are called according to His purpose." I highlighted the word LOVE because that's the basis of it all. If you love God, then you will do as He commands and it will not be burdensome. The negative things will now become positive. Life is still tough but with Christ in me, it will be easier because He is the one who is leading me.

God's Fingerprint: Mt. Mayon

If you will be asked to show God, how will you do it? God is invisible however, we can see Him through Mayon Volcano. He revealed Himself to me.

He is perfect. He stands majestically and can be seen whether you're on land or sea. If you patiently seek Him, He will show Himself to you. You may not see Him when clouds surround Him but mind you, He is always there and never leaves. When He gets angry, He pours out burning lavas and can ruin a whole community. But when He quiets down, His majesty still overrides His cruelty.

Mayon may be just one of God's fingerprints. And through His creation, His fingerprints are all over the world. It's just a matter of looking into the details and seeing things from His perspective.

When God Breaks Your Pride...

The most hurtful thing I ever experience in my life is when God breaks my ego. However, it is also the best thing because it has been a bondage breaking experience. God has been teaching me to lower my pride but I kept on ignoring that lesson until I get hurt. Eventhough I was hurt, He still embraced me and whispered to me that He did it because He loves me. Then when I submit, liberation filled my heart.

One instance was when I was out of town for a vacation, I was not feeling well. I played a "hero" that afternoon that made me feel worse in the evening. I was chilling and flu came to my system. At first, I thought I can make it through the night because my ego would tell me that I didn't need any help and I have to be tough. But God reminded me to lower my pride and seek for help. So, to make the long story short, I woke my friend up and she assisted me to feel better. And, true enough, I had a good night sleep.

Lesson learned...pride breaks people and humility liberates people. I would never forget that incident because God has used my physical weakness to learn that hard lesson. I'm just glad that even though He breaks me, He still continues to care for me. Praise God!

In His Time

"In His time, in His time. He makes all things beautiful in His time." God answers our prayers in His time. Often times, we are very impatient. It is our nature that we want things done right away. We hate delays and we don't want our plans to shatter. However, God taught me a lot of things about having faith in Him and waiting for His timing. Holding on to Him has never been easy because worry has filled my heart. Logic played a big role but it was not what God wanted me to practice. It is clear in the Bible that I have to work out my faith and not my logic. And, it's amazing to see God's hand move in my life when I surrender everything to Him. I learned to look at situations from different perspectives and God will always impress on me the positive perspective.


I just want to praise Him today because God's hand is on every situation I'm in. Also, I can see Him move in my two friends' lives too. I may have a different situation but God is now fulfilling His promises one by one and in His time.

Promises: Protection, Provision and Peace...

For the past few days, I was so worried about what will happen in my life. I'll be losing my job in a few days and I am not quite sure how my next job will be. I am having limited monetary funds and I need to pay up so much debts. Also, I am so busy that my time with God is quite limited. I just don't know what I should do. It seems like my life is a "storm" in the heat of the summer!

However, God kept on reminding me to trust Him and with His still small voice, He was telling me that He is with me. Finally, I was given a time to spend time with Him in Soularium yesterday. He prompted me to read Psalms 125-135 and it was so amazing that He spoke to me through those verses. He assured me that I need not worry about what will happen to me and gave me three promises: Protection, Provision and Peace. But the condition is, I need to fear Him and wait on Him. He also gave me an example through the story of Saul and Jonathan in 1 Samuel 13-14:23 that I should wait on the Lord in everything I do.

I know that waiting could be a problem for me but since this is His command to me, I have to be still and know that HE IS GOD! He will be the one to fight my battles and I will get through this storm in my life.

Remembering Mom

She was supposed to be 53 years old today but God took her away 13 years ago due to her sickness. I never had the chance to say goodbye to her properly nor thanked her for what she did. The only time and the last time I felt her hug was 3 months before she passed away. I never appreciated all her hard work during the first 14 years of my life and I regretted it. However, it all turned out that God has greater plans for me that's why He allowed this thing to happen. And, looking back, if it didn't happen, I will never appreciate my life like I do today. I will never learn how to achieve and strive hard for success. Also, I will never know how to take care of myself and also others.

My mom has always been a good mom. She makes sure that me and my brother's welfare are taken care of. And when we're sick, she would always sing "God Will Take Care of You" (Chinese Version) and monitor our condition. I also missed the Friday Pizza Night at Pizza Hut with All-Cheese Pizza or Meat Lovers Pizza. To her friends, she has always been the most loyal friend in the planet. She is a very down to earth woman who does not consider her social status. And as a Christian, she is the role model. She has touched the lives of many people and she was a blessing to most of them up until now. She has always been remembered as the mother and a friend to all. On this special day, this blog is dedicated to her. I know that she won't be able to read this anymore, but this is my way of saying that I am very proud do be born and raised by Rosalina Bendicion-Fung!

Ordinary for Extraordinary

I was given the privilege to meet someone in the showbiz industry not only from the local scene, but also the international. Yes, you guessed it right, she's none other than the International Singing Sensation, Charice. Her life was like a roller coaster and she has been an inspiration to many, including myself. It has been more than a year since I met her and her family and every time I'm with them, I really felt at home because they are the most down to earth people I ever met.  And, they are really nice people...what you see is what you get. She's one ordinary girl who has an ordinary dream and I believe that God's hand is upon her to do extraordinary things in life for His glory.


Her life inspires me so much and the priceless meetings with her, Tita Raquel and her family has always been remarkable! After all these gatherings, I was reminded of my own life. I am just an ordinary person who has dreams to go beyond my capability. However, I always thought that I am not worthy to do anything for God's kingdom because I have not been a good and true Christian. I have my "black spots" and I know that I won't be a good testimony to others. But the amazing thing is that every time I feel that way, God is using me the more. In my inadequacy, God's power is manifested and in my weakness, I became strong. Although, sometimes it's frustrating to be helpless, but He is very patient in using an ordinary person, like me, to expand His kingdom. I just have to be still, know that He is God and I have to always keep my feet on the ground. I may have not yet fulfilled His plans but I am excited to see what He will do in my life next. Indeed, God is using ordinary people for His extraordinary plans.

God's Provision Involves His Instruments

It's hard to have no money to spend especially in my career where in there are a lot of social activities. There's no such thing as FREE these days. It is really a test of faith on my part, holding on to His promises that He will provide for my needs. But one thing I realized is that God is teaching me some other things. He is molding my personality as He wants me to be. He wants me to rely on His provisions by involving people and/or institutions around me. In short He wants me to learn that I also needed help.

I am the eldest in our family and I am the provider. Also, I make sure that I will be the one to help and not being helped. I always have this thought that they need me more than I need them. For the past years, I always have enough money to spend and most of the time, I have more than enough. But this time around, it seems like all my monetary resources are easily gone. While contemplating last night, God spoke to me through the verse Romans 8:35 which says,

"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?" 

Also, in Matthew 6:25-27, 

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" 

He assured me that He will provide for my needs and I need not worry. However, He will use people and/or institutions around me for His provisions. It is hard for me to borrow money from anyone but if that is what God is teaching me, to allow people or institutions to help me and that I also needed help, then, by faith and humility, I will follow. God is my Jehovah Jireh!

Faith + Anticipation = Hope

Feeling hopeless can be really frustrating especially when life seems not going right. Hopeless people are most of the time pessimist about life because that is their perspective. They see the problem not the solution. Life is beautiful. Though hardships and trials come, it's a matter of how you look at things. Remember the success story of Adidas? The sales man saw the need of shoes in Africa that's why he was able to sell those shoes.

As a Christian, God wants me to enjoy life but not to enjoy too much that I will become so comfortable here on earth. He promised me a better place to live in and, by faith, I have to hold on to it with anticipation. To put it in layman's term, it's like leaving your old job and moving on to a new company with better opportunities. Your last thirty days may seem very long because you can't wait to leave and start a fresh career. In the middle of the thirty days, you may experience a whole lot of problems, trials and bigger responsibilities that you may not understand but the anticipation for your new job will keep you going.

Just like in life, you may experience hurts, temptations and waiting may become a frustration but having that hope God gave you, these things will not be as bad anymore. Because, you know that there will always be a light at the end of the tunnel.

Ants: Stewards of God

They are always in a queue going up and down the edge of my doorpost. It's annoying to have them around. And when they bite, I just can't ignore the itchiness. Yes, they're ants. Although for me, they're annoying little creatures, I had fun watching them. And, I learned a lot from them.

These creepy crawlers of red and black may be one of the smallest creatures, but they are the most responsible creation of God. As I was observing them, it seems like they are doing nothing but just queuing along my room. While following the queue, I realized that they're gathering food from the crumbs of the bread I ate. Of course, annoyed, I tortured them by pouring water on them and cleaned up that part of the room. I was glad that they're no longer there. However, the next day, I saw them queuing again but in my bathroom floor. I didn't see any bread crumbs around but their home is at the corner of the bathroom. Once again, I poured water on them and many died. But after the floor dries out, they again filed in their queue. Not contented, I blocked their homes with a little bit of conditioner. Then lo and behold, they looked for another exit and continued what they are doing. I just can't stop them.

Then it struck me that as a Christian, I am like these ants. The difference is they know how to persevere and though hardships and trials come their way, they still continue to move on with their lives. They save for the rainy days by the continuous search for food and storing up in their homes. It's such a shame because as a person, and a special creation of God, I should know better than those ants. I should know how to be a good steward of my life and my resources. God entrusted me this life but what did I do? For most of my life, I abused it with temporary pleasures... be it physical, emotional, mental and even spiritual. Well, these ants have taught me a lot. And I guess, this is God's way of telling me that I have to start over and be a responsible steward God wants me to be.

Double Life

We all wear different masks everyday. Masks that would make people laugh and masks that would make them cry. It's easy to play a role wearing a mask because people won't know who you really are. We live our lives according to what the society dictates but when you start to remove your mask and try to live your life according to who you really are, then, society will slowly depart from you.

Living a double life could become very tiring. On one hand, this is who I am but on the other, this is what the society wants. Then, as a Christian, society's pressure has more weight. It's easy to just go with the flow and "kiss" society's dictates but being a Christian, I have a higher standard. I know of a lot of Christians who are "righteous" in front of a lot of people but in their own personal lives, they are not. Hypocrites! I am also guilty as charged. After much contemplating, I was reminded that I am shaming no one but God. I have to practice what I preach and be real for a change.

Society may persecute me but I love God more than them. I know that in the end, I will be left alone. But, being alone with God...I'd long for that more than being with the society without God.

In Love Not Brainwashed

A friend of mine made a comment that Christianity is a religion that is brainwashing people. I wasn't prepared to answer back to that comment so, I tried to defend Christianity but wasn't successful because my answer was compromising the truth. I regretted it. But thinking about it, is Christianity really a brain washer religion?

Growing up in a Christian family made me think that I am already a Christian because I thought that I can inherit religion. But as I grew up, I was told that I have to accept Jesus Christ in my heart so that I could go to heaven and not hell. So, I accepted Him when I was in grade 3 because I definitely don't want to go to hell. I involved myself with a lot of ministries and followed all the rules. I honestly, got frustrated with all the rules because deep inside me, I know that I will never be that "goody two shoes" person everyone expected me to be. I slowly faded through all the ministry involvement. Until one day, I get burned out and stopped everything. I tried to find some answers but the only answer I had was to be still and return to God. Then, I recommitted my life to Him and seek for His healing. I'm so glad that with open arms, He just took me back.

I've always thought that Christianity was brainwashing people. But I realized that it is not. It's simply God stirring the hearts of those who seek Him. Christianity is not a religion but rather, it is having a relationship with God and letting Him rule my life. Though I sometimes fall, but it's now easier for me to run to Him and confess all my sins because I don't want to hurt Him. Also, I often remind myself of His love for me and what He did on the cross. For some, I may be brainwashed but for me, I'm just simply in love with Someone who first loved me.